Premature ejaculation is an issue that can seriously affect the lives of those who suffer from it as it can become a source of great mental distress. There are a variety of physical and psychological reasons that may cause premature ejaculation for people with penises, but there are also many treatments that may help controlling or solving the problem.

What is premature ejaculation?

Premature ejaculation, according to international guidelines, is when someone climaxes within one minute of penetrating their partner. While the time for ejaculation varies greatly among people, the average is understood to be around 5 and a half minutes. The time of ejaculation differs widely based on a large number of factors, therefore, what counts as premature will also alter from couple to couple. If the time of your ejaculation causing you or your partner continuous distress and dissatisfaction in your sex life than you should consider getting professional help.

What causes premature ejaculation?

It is understood that people with penises may struggle with premature ejaculation either as a problem that they always had (primary) or as a new issue they’ve developed (secondary). While primary premature ejaculation is more likely to have a psychological source, secondary can be caused by both mental and physical factors. Either way there is judgement-free help, advice and treatment available from a variety of sources, like your GP or your local sexual health clinic.

The most common causes for premature ejaculation are stress, depression, anxiety, sexual trauma, relationship issues, alcohol, high blood pressure, an inflamed prostate gland, diabetes or thyroid problems. Most of the time treating the underlying issue can help to achieve a more satisfactory ejaculation time, though working through psychological factors may prove harder than solving a physical problem.

Home remedies & self help

If you struggle with your ejaculation time and you think you are coming too early, there are some techniques and tricks you can try at home before you seek medical advice.

Using a thicker condom can help decrease your sensitivity so you may climax later. There are a number of condom brands that offer products that are designed to reduce friction and sensitivity so you can elongate your intimate sessions with your partner without using any chemicals to numb your penis.

Masturbating a couple of hours before sex may also help as it should remove some of the urgency and excitement you feel when penetrating your partner. You may also want to consider trying sex positions where your partner can be on top as they will be able to pay attention to your body language and pull away temporarily when you are close to climaxing. Alternatively, you can try to take breaks during sex by changing positions and distracting your thoughts, so you think about something else.

Some people who struggle with premature ejaculation may also benefit from attending couples’ therapy with their partner where they are encouraged to explore and resolve issues that may affect the relationship and intimacy between them.

Medication

If the above techniques don’t seem to improve your ejaculation time, you should contact your GP or a sexual health professional who should be able to advise you with appropriate medication.

The most commonly used pill prescribed to treat premature ejaculation is dapoxetine that is a selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor. You would need to take the medication 1-3 hours before sex but no more than once a day.

Alternatively, there are also creams and sprays that you can try to apply to your penis – these often contain ingredients such as lidocaine that numbs the area, significantly reducing sensations. You may also want to consider combining condoms with a cream for a greater effect. Your GP should be able to help you choose the right cream or spray for you.

Summary

Premature ejaculation is a common sexual dysfunction that effects people with penises of all ages. There are many different reasons that may cause premature ejaculation, both psychological and physical, and most often finding and treating the underlying source of the issue helps with climax times too.

It is possible to control premature ejaculation by a number of techniques you can try at home. These include masturbation, change of sex positions and using thicker condoms or numbing creams to reduce sensitivity of your penis.

Your doctor or sexual health clinic can also help you with judgement-free advice and treatment that may involve prescribing you a pill, referring you to a sex therapist or examining you physically to make sure there are no health issues that cause you to come too quickly.

If your ejaculation time is causing you and/or your partner distress and dissatisfaction, don’t be afraid to ask for help as treatment is available and you will be able to get more enjoyment out of sex and life in general.

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